wishcave:

*opens jacket* hey u wanna buy some oh jesus fuck it’s cold *closes jacket*

(via buttsnakes)

prouvaires:

the ridiculous thing is that i’m pretty smart but at the same time i manage to be the dumbest person alive

(via beardedswagon)

rupindah:

I’m really good at keeping secrets because five minutes later I forget what you told me because I don’t care

(via xoxosimrankaur)

alltimeangela:

why does leonardo dicaprio always end up dead in the water with no girlfriend

(via hawaii--orchid)

marypoppinthatpussy:

The number of inches you leave my door open is the number of inches the depth of my knife will be in your chest

(via hawaii--orchid)

cleadmau5:

larapeople:

I just realized that the word bed looks like a bed

My brain literally stopped working for a second

(via justenjoytheshoww)

sani-a:

why can’t my fat leave me everything else does

(Source: luvvd, via itsallabouthersheys)